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NOTE: The notebooks in this photo represent only a few of my over 60 journals of writing that I have kept and continue to write over the past 10 years..) Do you sometimes feel frustrated with your self-development journey? Do you wish you could already feel secure in yourself, trust your instincts, love how you communicate, and feel relaxed and trusting in your relationships, work, and how you show up for yourself, your family, friends, and community? Even writing this list o

You know that icky feeling you get after you've snapped at someone you care about? Yeah, that's where I'm at right now as I write this post. Just a few hours ago, I had a moment with a friend where I totally lost my cool. I blamed them for something they didn't even mean to do, and then got mad at them when I chose to help them out even though I didn’t want to. It's not a great feeling. Seeing the look on their face when I expressed my raw frustration, immediately led me down

In the ever-changing landscape of relationships, I’ve navigated through both the calm seas and the stormy waves of my inner emotional world. Moments of uncertainty have been my most challenging companions, testing my resilience, my patience, and my very understanding of love. Standing at these crossroads, I’ve felt the temptation to seek immediate shelter from the storm, to find a quick fix that would ease the discomfort NOW. Yet, time and again, I’ve discovered that the rich

By Andy Hix / Mindfulness Coach + NVC Practitioner In this article I’m going to imagine that I’m having a chat with my Inner-Critic as if it’s a person inside of me. I hope this helps to illustrate what he’s for, how it can end up causing us no end of pointless suffering, and how to make best use of him. Hello Andy’s Inner-Critic, good to speak to you! Hi! So what kind of thing do you criticise Andy for? He should be doing more of almost everything: earning, saving, exercisin

How do you handle it when someone criticises you? Do you get defensive? Deny it's true? Do you attack? “You’re worse than me - what about that thing you did!” Do you freeze and shrink into your chair? Eeek I can’t handle this / There’s something wrong with me.. ? What if I told you that every criticism and judgment that someone fires at you can be an opportunity to form a deeper connection and grow closer to yourself and each other? Last week I dove into an experience of ma

I have grown up with a harsh inner voice that easily and readily reminded me that I was not clever enough to study certain subjects at university, not interesting enough to be loved long term in a relationship and somehow always saying the wrong thing in order to be fully loved and accepted by others. Does that sound familiar in any way? I believe it is exactly that critical inner voice which led me towards the work that I now do as a compassionate and authentic relating coac

Have you ever experienced the frustration of pouring your heart out to a loved one, only for them to interpret your words in an entirely different light? It's exasperating, isn't it? That sense of being consistently misunderstood, and perhaps, your partner feels the same way. If this scenario resonates with you, you're not alone. This blogpost is tailored just for you—especially if you've been on a journey of self-discovery, delving into therapy, meditation, and various forms

Ever feel like you're the one always seeking connection in your relationship? It can be frustrating when it seems like your partner isn't as interested in spending time together as you are. But have you ever wondered what's behind your need for closeness and connection? In this blog post, we'll dive into what connection truly means for us humans, why it's essential, and how understanding your need for connection can transform your relationship with yourself and others, by sup

Sometimes, when I take a moment and really breathe in the state of our world, it's almost too much to bear. Like many of you, I've found myself caught in a whirlwind of emotions - anger, frustration, hopelessness, fear and anxiety around how to even approach the separation and pain that is unfolding in the world. Watching the news, reading about conflicts, and even witnessing disagreements amongst my loved ones and between myself and close friends, I sometimes Imagine that w

How can we love one another in the ways that truly resonate with our hearts desires? Understanding my Love Language and fostering an open dialogue about my desires, has truly transformed my ability to receive and give love in exactly the ways that makes mine and my partners body, hearts and minds tingle with the bonds of intimacy. By approaching your partner with genuine curiosity and a commitment to clear communication, you can build bridges of intimacy that enrich and stren

Plugging in.. Listening... To the resonance or life Moving through me, Living in me, Connecting me to the pulsating web of creation.. The energy of life that speaks through my skin, Through your eyes, Through our words, Through moving in silence, Through the vibration of sound, The intensity of taste, The pleasure of touch, The wisdom of pain, Connecting with this flow of life, That we are all a part of.. That is the essence of my work.. Communication is just 1 way for me to

“ to connect in a way that makes natural giving possible” These are the first words that Marshal Rosenberg says in this video of him giving a live workshop in San Francisco on Non- Violent Communication. And a quote that was at the top of my website for many years: ' What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on a mutual giving from the heart .' And that is really what NVC is all about to me. How can I give myself to you from the heart? How

This is not the first time that I have mentioned the topic of Guilt in my weekly news letters to you. (If you have been listening to my Podcast then you may have listened to the last episode that was published called : The Power of Transforming Guilt into Presence and Compassion: ) It has been a powerful and transformation, albeit uncomfortable, familiar and often debilitating emotion to connect with and experience (sometimes relentlessly) over the course of my existence as a

Embodying NVC philosophy + Intentions If you have been exploring the work of Nonviolent Communication (OR Compassionate and Authentic Relating as I like to call it) for a while now, and you notice that there are some really clunky parts to this method that are not working smoothly for you. Then welcome to being human! It is very likely that as you try to integrate your learning and the skills that you value from this “method”, that you can fall into a performative way of list

4 ways to support important conversations to flow Sticking together is the ultimate goal of all relationships right? What we all long for is a sense of belonging, to know that we are truly there for one another. To trust that we are welcomed and accepted by the ones that we love and that they too feel safe in our company, knowing that ultimately we love and care for one another beyond judgments, arguments and misconceptions. So it is no wonder that when you talk about importa

That vulnerable moment of hurt, annoyance, confusion, anxiety and often insecurity that comes when you have just shared something very important with someone and you get the impression that they didn't quite get the importance of what you just shared, they “misheard” you or got distracted, or went into expressing themselves instead. It can be devastating and extremely frustrating, especially if this happens often and repeatedly, with the people that you love and feel closest

How to sort through the many voices in your head! If you, like me, have been tortured in the night by the numerous voices that plague your brain with the various angles, perspectives, opinions and options that you should take when facing uncertainty in a relationship with someone you love or deeply care about. Well then you know the twisting pangs of anxiety, the sometimes sleepless nights and the distraction from your work and other areas of life, that these reactions can so

The tragedy of expectation: Unfortunately I have learnt the hard way, that when I expect my loved ones to act, react and behave in exactly the way that I want them to, then I find them moving further away from my heart and less likely to act in the way the way that I was hoping for. I painfully remember a time when I really wanted my partner to respond to my messages “more quickly” during a particularly difficult period in my life. I wanted his attention, care and support to

"We are asking one person to give us, what once an entire village used to provide" say's Esther Perel. The model of 2 people (plus the kids), has become the "norm" in our modern, western society and culture. I enjoy the idea of a family nest with parents and children living under 1 roof and so by sharing this quote with you, I am not suggesting that this model is "wrong" or "bad", I simply connect with the wisdom and learning that we can take from Esther's perspective.

How to master clear, honest, compassionate conversations between you and the people you love! Frustration is often the first sign that you are not connecting with the person in front of you in a way that feels good or supports you both to be heard and understood.. These are 5 common “mistakes” I come across regularly in relationship dynamics and which can get in the way of actually connecting to your partner, friend, family member, co-work er… The good news is that you can do